Saying NO When It Needs To Be Said

Humans seem to want to always please each other. However, there are days when we need to say "no" to a request. This must happen at home, on the job, in the church and just in life in general.

Don't be a patsy or pushover
If you are headed to Sea Cows Bay from Road Town at 1:00pm for a 1:30pm appointment, should you agree to take someone to East End? You can offer to find them a taxi but you really can't be in two places at one time.

What about those situations on the job where you know that your co-workers like to set you up to do the grunge work? You can offer assistance but you must say "no" at some point or you will be labelled the office pushover who takes on everyone's task.

Get a spine!
I have had to say "no" on several occassions starting from last year. I am simply tired of being taken for granted. of course on the job, you have to weigh decisions out wisely. Sometimes a conversation with a supervisor can help when you see everyone pulling at you for help. When you are a new employee, they try to orient you to become their slave in some organizations. Sometimes, supervisors are guilty of this because they just want someone to make them look good.

It is very sad to know that coworkers just want to know your strengths so that they can in some cases make you weak. If you find yourself handling personal errands daily, you may want to address this. "Any other duties as assigned" still mean duties that relate specifically to the job or organization. Of course, in a lot of cases, the more you assist in other units, the more well-rounded you can become. The setback to that is when you work in an organization rife with corruption and nepotism, you will see others rising and rewarded and there is no recognition for you. For me, that's when it's time to speak with the supervisor and management about opportunities for you to be promoted or have your pay increased.

You must tell them YES but they tell you NO
If you feel that your needs, work and accomplishments are being ignored, it's time to find another job. Don't stay in an organization where you are unhappy or uncomfortable. Work towards getting situations resolved, but if the effort is futile, it's time to move on.

You can still stay "yes" when others ask for help but do not overdraw on your personal time and energy if you know you are not able to or if you are busy. So when your sister calls two minutes for her date asking for you to babysit and you have plans to study, kindly ask her if she can ask someone else to help or let her bring the children later in the evening when they are already sleeping.

Many of us have to learn to balance our time and fulfil our personal duties as well as getting adequate rest. You can't say "yes" to everyone and "no" to your health, family and professional obligations and to yourself!