Friends... Or Not?

I have been toggling with the word, 'friend,' over the past weeks. I have had people question my 'friendship,' and I, in turn, have done the same. I've also seen a few posts on social media about 'friendship.'

I checked the Oxford online dictionary and here is the definition:
"a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations."

Did we let music define what a friend is?
I love music, so I went to look for songs about friendship:

"That's What Friends Are For"
Dionne Warwick Feat. Elton John, Gladys Knight and Stevie Wonder.
“Keep smilin', keep shinin'
Knowin' you can always count on me for sure
That's what friends are for
For good times and bad times
I'll be on your side forevermore
That's what friends are for”

"True Friend (Buss A Shot)"
Demarco
"Me haffi big up all me friend dem
Me friend dem ever there
Me get a one food, yeah, the food haffi share
Me tell dem say we a go get rich fi this year
Weh dem did deh when we a bounce inna one pair"

Did Biz Markie help to blur the line between friendships between men and women in "Just a Friend?"
“But when I sprung the question, she acted kind of strange
Then when I asked, "Do ya have a man?", she tried to pretend
She said: "No, I don't, I only have a friend"

Or did Kelly Price muddy the waters with "Friend of Mine?"?
"She was a friend of mine (Yeah-yeah)
She left with my man (Why, why, why?)
She lied (Yeah-yeah), cheated (Oh, lord), took all I had (She was, yeah)
She was a friend of mine (Ooh, ooh-ooh)
She used what she knew (I don't know why)
She lied (Yeah), cheated (Ooh-oh), and left me confused"

Randy Newman probably sang it best in the Toy Story hit song, "You've got a friend in me":

You've got a friend in me
You've got troubles, and I've got 'em, too
There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you
We stick together and we see it through
'Cause you've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me"

Who are my friends?
Seriously, I really started to question who my friends were. I know lots of people with common passions, hobbies, lifestyles, or family life. I also have people that I check on regularly - just to see if they are okay. I also have those who check on me. But are we friends?

Are your friends your friends?
Choose a close person to you, not a lover or family member, and answer these questions.

• What do you have in common with this person?
• What was the reason for your last phone call or message to this person?
• Do you ask this person for advice?
• Has this person tried to help you in any way in the past six months?
• If you were gravely ill, would you tell this person?
• Are you upset when this person does not agree with your point of view?

Switch it around. Change the perspective. How have the answers changed? How would this person answer these questions about you?

Depending on how you answer, you may be an acquaintance: “a person one knows slightly, but who is not a close friend.”

I guess that would cover buddies on Facebook, fellow alumni, church folk, teammates, coworkers, etc.

As stated earlier, this post was sparked by recent interactions. I'm not the best 'friend.' I'm a loner whose childhood friends were her radio and books. I'm a problem solver who loves challenges. I've had no choice but to figure out things on my own. Maybe, I'm not the best at setting clear expectations. I'll improve.

Cherish Your Friends
These are my parting thoughts:

• Cherish the people who care for you.
• Connect with people who make you comfortable while holding you accountable.
• Don't assume that a nice person is your friend.
• Set boundaries.
• Be respectful of people's time and boundaries.
• Back off if your energy is not being reciprocated.
• Consider figuring things out on your own.
• Invest in what grows you.

Ribbon

Poem: Cover-up

Is it a Cover-up? This is my latest poem.

Scan the QR Code for my book, "Be Inspired: Poems by Linette Rabsatt."

 

My July 2024 Poetic Journey and a Poem

July has been a great month for sharing my poetry! I continue to be thankful to those who share my work and encourage me.

Here is a recap of my activities:

• I have three poems published in DoubleSpeak Magazine.
• Two of my poems are in the July issue of Pulse Poetry Magazine.
• My poem, "My Thoughts," is officially in the Poetry Archive competition.
• I participated in a poetry competition hosted by She Barz in June and uploaded my entry, "De-Stress," on my YouTube page.
• I joined the Lucid Voices Magazine team and was featured. We have a lot more to share in the coming months.
• On July 18, I performed as the featured reader at the CAPS Online Poetry Reading. I am forever grateful to Mike Jurkovic for having the confidence in me.
• I performed my poem, "Planet and People in Harmony," at the Welcome and Cocktail Reception for the 11th COM:ES Exhibition on Environmental Sustainability. I'm on from 41:24 to 44:19. I combined two poems to share my message and call to action.
• On July 28, I joined Nita Chase and other wonderful poets on Poets and Spoken Word Artists Exhaling on the Mic. My participation was not planned, but I was very grateful for the opportunity to share my work with such talented poets.
• On July 31, I was interviewed for Wide Awoke Wednesday organized by the wonderful people behind Pulse Poetry Magazine and Pour Your Heart Out Open Mic.

I continue to say that I want my work to inspire the world. I am grateful for your feedback and encourage you to comment.

Here's a poem from my book, "Be Inspired: Poems by Linette Rabsatt":

The Nurturer
seeing him is a richness
of fulfillment,
I cannot understand the depths
of this love,
completion is only secondary
to the achievement
of being nurtured
inspired
and commended by
one who distinctly
resides in loving peace
with himself
his surroundings and
his being,
acceptance of his philosophy
is a mere decision
delighted and uplifted by
the assets of his heart and
loving spirit.
© Linette Rabsatt

I will be participating in the Mental Health Poetry Contest on August 3, 2024 organized by the talented, She Barz. I am very excited about this event. The link will be shared on my various outlets.

Poetic Journey - June 2024 YouTube and Magazine Features

Have you gotten your copy of my Kindle Book: "Be Inspired: Poems by Linette Rabsatt"?

My poetic journey for June 2024 included:

Magazines

• DoubleSpeak Magazine - 3 poems
• Pulse Poetry Magazine - 2 poems

I feel honored to work with these talented poets and am extremely happy to be featured in these publications.

Videos

• My poem, "My Thoughts," is officially in the Poetry Archive competition
• I recently participated in a poetry competition hosted by She Barz. Here is my entry, "De-Stress"

Never be afraid to share your talents. Invest in what grows you!

Poem: revisited

Please check out my latest video of my Poem, revisited. It's my first try at video creation. I would be grateful for your feedback on the poem and the video. Please subscribe to my channel.

Happy Father's Day 2024

I wrote this poem in 2008 and shared it with the Island Sun Newspaper for Father's Day. I enjoy writing for celebrations because we should honor our family members and community with our talents. I created the graphic very simply. I didn't want too much prettiness or flowers. I didn't want it to resemble the typical Father's Day images. 

On Facebook, there's always some controversy about fathers and their role. I don't indulge in those topics. I am appreciative of my family and the role they played in shaping me. I can only encourage young and new parents to do their best for their children. If the romance has dwindled and you can't get along, find a common ground to take care of your child. That advice was for both mom and dad.

As parents, we nurture our children physically, mentally, and emotionally. Don't let a spouse or significant other, your job, or friends distract you from your family. Invest in what grows you.

Ribbon

Poetry is Alive: My May 2024 Journey

May 2024 has been exciting for me as a poet. I shared my work in online readings, in magazines, and during a live poetry competition. I feel energized to share my work and to encourage other writers to do the same.

However, I also heard several persons say that they felt burned out I remind you of the following:

• A job should not define you. You are more than a position.
• Invest your spare time in you. Learn something, write something, grow something, or make something.
• Think carefully about work-life balance. Work hard, shine, meet, and beat the timelines, but take care of yourself.
• Rest, pray, sing, laugh, and dance.

I also want to encourage you to invest in yourself. I have worked hard to share my work. I look for journals, competitions, online open mics, and magazines. I want to inspire the world with my work; I have to champion that effort. Please invest in what grows you!

Check out my various participations this May:

• Pulse Poetry Magazine – I shared two poems in the June 2024 issue. 
• Interview on Quintessential Listening: Poetry Online Radio and YouTube with Dr. Michael Anthony Ingram: This was invigorating. I am truly inspired. 
• Pour Your Heart Out Open Mic Virtual Contest: I performed my poem, “A Michael Jackson Story,” and enjoyed interacting with the other poets. 
• My fellow poets and I were nominated for the 2024 National Spoken Word Awards.
• LA Rabsatt for Category #7 Best International Artist
• Papi's Poetry Corner for Category #17 Radio Show/TV or Radio Station of the Year
• Lady Crucible/Neia Coney for Category #16 Rising Star Of The Year
• Angel Kim-Mack for Category #18 Best Spoken Word Storyteller
• Nelly Vee for Category #20 P.O.E.T. Community Service Award

Also, as I think about my statement about a job not defining you, I am sharing something fresh from my archives. 

a new definition

I looked at myself and said, no way
my definition has gone astray
what is my purpose? what is my vision?
how am I making correct decisions
if I don't have a clear definition?

I said if my goal was to look like BET
then there's no future in that for me
how can I define myself by these TV standards
and make my life another sad played-out ballad

is it a man that I need to define me
to fight another sister recklessly?
girl, you can have that brother
my definition is for me to be a better mother

material things? they've come and gone
I focus on my needs - the priority, #1
this personal definition is not of my pocket
it's my soul, my passion, the love I give and get

my education - yea that helps me plot my vision
raise my awareness and keep me in unison
still, a degree does not define me fully
but has opened my eyes to Mother Earth around me

so where does my definition lie?
a tiny taste of humble pie
brings me to realize that life
though tough and filed with rife
makes my definition complete

the love that has been given
and the love that I have given
makes me complete and real
my definition

© Linette Rabsatt

Please don't forget to get a copy of my Kindle book, "Be Inspired: Poems by Linette Rabsatt." Also, please visit my YouTube pageYouTube page for my latest upload, "A Broken Pen,A Broken Pen," which was shared for Poetry Downtown Rutland.