In the past few days, I had to speak to several young persons concerning jobs and life in general. I knew one from when he was younger, and I have never met the other. Both persons thanked me for sharing some unsolicited advice with them. As I reflect, I remember getting random advice and good counsel when I was their age, but that was when I had messed up or was about to.
As you may have figured out, I am always chatting with
Dr. Dierdra Wheatley-Peters, and we have been throwing around ideas on how we can encourage our youth in the community. When we messaged each other today, I shared that I wanted to write something along these lines because I wish someone had advised me differently. Some persons have written about what they would say to their younger selves, but I wanted to share my perspective. My story is not very unique, neither is it typical. I am grateful for every experience because I have grown tremendously.
To my younger self:
1. Think Career over JobWhen I was sixteen (16), I was confident that I would be an accountant. After one (1) semester at the
University of the Virgin Islands, I changed my major. I earned exceptional grades in high school in accounting. However, I realize that I just like mathematics and accounts for the challenge of finding the answer or balancing. I switched my major to marketing because it seemed fun, and I loved being creative.
Therefore, I would tell any young person to sit and speak with persons in their field of interest. Research locally, regionally, and internationally about the opportunities and what the work entails. Request an unpaid internship to get the experience. Today, I am advising my children to pursue what they love. We have to start getting work experience somewhere, but you must keep your career goal in mind. Also, if you change your mind about your career path, it is okay. I've gone from accounting to marketing, but I am a human resources professional and writer (after struggling with English classes).
2. Put Romantic Relationships on PauseI did get this advice because adults would tell me not to get pregnant. Instead, I think they needed to inspire me to love myself and not to get emotionally attached. I needed to hear that a man did not define me. Someone needed to tell me that I should put my love into building me.
At that time, I needed to hone my craft and become the exceptional me. I agreed with
Teddy Pendergrass when he sang, "So good, good lovin' somebody and somebody loves you back." However, at that age, I needed to love myself and improve my wellbeing.
3. Embrace Your BrandI tried to follow trends to feel a part of something or to belong. Anyone who knows me today knows that I set my trends. The bracelets I wear, as I typed this, were made by my daughter. I upcycled a broken watch into a bracelet with colored pebbles. Back then, I would have wanted to fit in. I changed my hair and damaged it to please people. I encourage young people today: be your beautiful self and set trends. Build your brand and be confident with it.
4. Do More VolunteeringThe old people used to say, "had a been know never come in front." It was only recently that the BVI mandated that all graduating high school seniors complete 120 hours of community service. When I first went to UVI in 1995, my sisters were in the process of completing their community service hours as a graduating requirement. I wished that I had that experience.
The benefits of volunteering include job experience and access to references who can attest to your work ethic. You also have the fulfillment of doing something meaningful. Some parents were opposed to the community service requirement in the BVI; however, the benefits far outweigh any disadvantages. We may claim that performing the hours is time-consuming, but it is time well spent. It also opens job opportunities.
5. Stand Up and Take Action
As a child, I was an extrovert. After going to high school, I pulled into a shell. Even today, I am the quiet voice in a crowded room. I would tell my younger self to voice opinions and take more risks. Somehow we become shy and reactive. I do not know if it is the harsh criticism we often give each other. It could be adults or persons in seniority disregard the opinions of the young people, inexperienced or subordinate. Sometimes our best innovations come from a novice.
So I would tell any young person today to share your ideas and your talents. Please be respectful but do not bottle up your inspiration. We allow children to showcase their amazing imaginations in primary school. So what happens when we become adults? We let people influence us to hide our imaginations and conform to the norms. Continue to dream! Do articulate your ideas to persons who will appreciate your viewpoint and who can implement your suggestions.
6. "Not Every Skin Teeth is a Smile"
I am sure every Caribbean island has a version of this colloquialism. Per
The Virgin Islands Dictionary, 'skin teet' means "to smile widely and often." The saying tells us to be mindful of persons who may seem pleasant. They may have bad intentions. You would not expect anything negative because the person will seem genuine.
I was told this but never understood until I started working. I watched one of my appointment letters circulate in an office by persons who warmly greeted me on my first day. I would not have expected that from seasoned professionals. I have learned well, and I would never do that to another person.
ReflectionI shared the top six (6) things that I wish someone had shared with me when I was younger. Do you agree? What would you add or subtract? Will you advise young people within your reach to consider similar to what I have shared?
One hymn line that has stuck with me is "
it only takes a spark to get the fire going." Let's ignite a fire of passion, confidence, and critical thinking in our youth. Each adult has something that they can share to encourage some young person. Please be mindful of your approach and do not overdo it or bombard the person. Share your story so that your listeners can understand the context. Go out and inspire a young person today.
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