Have You Ever Heard a Colleague Cry on the Job?

Have you ever heard any employee or colleague cry? Earlier in my career, I would never fathom this in a professional setting. More recently, I have teared up on my job, and I have witnessed others break down. So what is happening to us? Are we so scared to speak up that we internalize these stresses until we break down?

In the BVI, we contended with the 2017 hurricanes, and since March 2020, we have struggled with COVID-19. Could the impact of these traumas cause us to become more emotional and sensitive? Are our leaders becoming less caring and empathetic and so outcome-driven that we break under toxic work environments?

I am no expert and have no answer. However, I know that we are struggling. I often feel like I am stuck and frustrated. I feel unable to meet some objectives - not because I am incapable but because of a lack of proper systems and human and technological resources. I will not tear up for this. However, I get angry, especially when other areas achieve their goals and receive facilities. I vent when I see leaders wasting resources that we can use for greater efficiency.

I have come close to tears when I become empathetic. Working in human resources is not for the light-hearted. I often need to pull away and rejuvenate. As others unload, I process and try to help. I know I cannot take on everyone's burdens, but I often provide a shoulder and support. The worst experience I have had is hearing someone plead for a different opportunity due to an unpleasant working situation. I could not help. I often wonder what I would have done if I were in a similar circumstance.

Considerations are different for everyone, and although we see bright and beautiful faces in our workplaces, many persons are hurting. COVID-19 shifted our normalcy into remote learning and work, unemployment, short-term and long-term effects of illness, loss of loved ones, and disconnection to loved ones. We struggled in July and August 2021 when the territory lost 36 persons to COVID-19. Living in a small community brings these tragedies closer because we know many persons or their relatives. It was a difficult time.

Let us consider persons dealing with work and personal stresses simultaneously. While only a few talk about it, mental health remains a concern. I continue to remind you that we are our brother's keeper. Until we emulate brotherly love over perfection in a workspace, we continue to endorse toxic work environments.

I encourage persons to seek professional or pastoral assistance when they become so emotional. I often retreat to my garden with music to destress. We all need an outlet, and I encourage you to secure yours - and make it enjoyable!

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POEM: When the Music Hits You

when the music hits you

skank

wine

dip

and even if you trip

shake

twist

jump

pump your fists

wiggle your hips

jiggle your arms

move

like love kissed you

turned you around

and surrounded you

with peace

and happiness

feel the vibrations

capture the moment

with movement

off or on the beat

move your feet

release your fears

and when the music hits you

skank

wine

dip

and even if you trip

shake

twist

jump

pump your fists

wiggle your hips

jiggle your arms

move!

Ⓒ Linette Rabsatt

POEM: A Better Life by Linette Rabsatt performed at the 2021 World Food Day Ceremony

This is my latest poem, "A Better Life," performed for the Department of Agriculture and Fisheries' 2021 World Food Day Ceremony. You can view the full ceremony at https://fb.watch/8IuzJpDSVW/

POEM: Intense Analysis

Some say I came from an ape

then I was like sheep to slaughter

enslaved and treated like a mule

to work like I had no value

other than being a tool

to make a next man rich

then I became a goat

and I broke the barriers

jumped the gate

and escaped

modern days today

and now I am back in 

sheep mode

falling for the criticisms

bad information

pretty much enslaved

mentally

while some say

the sheep mode

is good because Jesus

saved the 100th sheep

who was lost

while some literally

treat me as a horse

as a debate rages on

really and truly

I want to be more like a bird

flying free

or like a bee

a pollinator

but after all

we are humans

supposedly the highest order

but more living

in disorder

jealousy, hatred

and maladministration

in the age of information

we have regressed

lost that progress

from the supposed 

ape age

the primintive time

when we were resilient

and more silent

how will we find

ourselves again?

New Video from Koffee - West Indies (Official Video)

I am loving this track and video:

• high energy
• penetrating vibe
• video showing some really cool island scenes
• real 'West Indian' flavor with the food and the family

I need to hear this song today! Thank you, Koffee for "West Indies."

Words are Powerful: How Do You Use Your Tongue?

Do you think that there is power in your tongue?

The Bible gives us several references about our tongues and the power they possess. Read:

• 1 Peter 3:10: For, Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech...."
• Proverbs 10:19: Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues.
• Proverbs 15:4: The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.
• Proverbs 21:23: Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity.

Although we have multiple translations of the Bible, we should have no difficulty understanding what these verses and other similar ones are saying. We ought to keep our conversations positive and refrain from defamation, negativity, and gossip.

I take this advice even more seriously because we impact people with the things that we say. While we may want to deny it, the people in our circle play a role in influencing our choices or aversions. Due to the nature of the interaction, our educators, religious leaders, coworkers, and social media contacts impact us more than we think.

Education System
Do you remember that teacher who saw your potential and encouraged you to try something? I fondly remember joining an English Literature class at the University of the Virgin Islands - apprehensive because I struggled with Literature in High School. The lecturer, Dr. Vincent Cooper, awakened my interest in the subject because he was engaging. He asked us to write a few poems for assignments, for which I was not confident. However, surprisingly, he gave me positive feedback and encouraged me to keep writing. Twenty-five years later, I have a catalog of several hundred poems.

Conversely, we have friends and colleagues who have had opposite experiences with educators. The words that we utter to others, especially young people, can have lasting effects. I know someone who recalls the negative words spoken about his ability to learn. Thankfully, he persevered and has become a positive role model to others. Therefore, we need to ensure that we need to remember our purpose in developing others.

Workplace
I thrive in a workplace where my talents are recognized, encouraged, and developed. I do not want my manager to micromanage, and I never want to be an overbearing manager. Unfortunately, we have managers who berate employees and harbor a toxic atmosphere in the workplace. Even a positive and energetic employee will eventually break or leave. I remember visiting an establishment and hearing the manager cursing the employees. I was very embarrassed. Most of the employees left eventually because the manager did not understand how to communicate.

Employees do underperform, waste resources or do not follow instructions. However, leaders need to communicate with their teams! Yelling or insulting employees will not help them improve; instead, they will resign or retaliate.

Religion
I know you may be surprised because I started the article with scriptures. However, we have a few persons in these organizations who can be brutal too. We often feel that we are frank, but most often, we are mean. We disapprove of superficial things like appearance, ability or inability to pay tithes, denomination, career choice, ethnicity, or family heritage. Instead, we need to be more inclusive, understanding, and encouraging. I will take constructive criticism over an insult. What about you? I am not saying that religious leaders should condone what they know to be immoral, unethical, or illegal in their congregations. They should be nurturing the adherents to live right by being excellent role models in their words and actions.

Social Media
Social Media has enabled us to take freedom of speech to another level. People feel they can say anything, tag anyone and make other persons look bad. Sometimes, I see persons post experiences or ask questions, and they are insulted or scolded. I never post a negative response; I either send a private message or provide an answer to assist them.

 
I am not perfect. I get annoyed with people (more often lately), especially when I know they know better. I try not to hurt them, but sometimes, I have to be blunt. I have people insult my choices, my hair, my work, and my poetry. However, I learned a long time ago that my happiness is not determinant on anyone else. I have grown to understand that my words are powerful, and if I use them correctly, I can be a catalyst for positive change.

Remember, you hold power in your speech. Do not push negative agendas or deter others from seeking to improve themselves. Use your words wisely to influence positive change!

Advice I Needed to Hear When I was Young

In the past few days, I had to speak to several young persons concerning jobs and life in general. I knew one from when he was younger, and I have never met the other. Both persons thanked me for sharing some unsolicited advice with them. As I reflect, I remember getting random advice and good counsel when I was their age, but that was when I had messed up or was about to.

As you may have figured out, I am always chatting with Dr. Dierdra Wheatley-Peters, and we have been throwing around ideas on how we can encourage our youth in the community. When we messaged each other today, I shared that I wanted to write something along these lines because I wish someone had advised me differently. Some persons have written about what they would say to their younger selves, but I wanted to share my perspective. My story is not very unique, neither is it typical. I am grateful for every experience because I have grown tremendously.

To my younger self:

1. Think Career over Job
When I was sixteen (16), I was confident that I would be an accountant. After one (1) semester at the University of the Virgin Islands, I changed my major. I earned exceptional grades in high school in accounting. However, I realize that I just like mathematics and accounts for the challenge of finding the answer or balancing. I switched my major to marketing because it seemed fun, and I loved being creative.

Therefore, I would tell any young person to sit and speak with persons in their field of interest. Research locally, regionally, and internationally about the opportunities and what the work entails. Request an unpaid internship to get the experience. Today, I am advising my children to pursue what they love. We have to start getting work experience somewhere, but you must keep your career goal in mind. Also, if you change your mind about your career path, it is okay. I've gone from accounting to marketing, but I am a human resources professional and writer (after struggling with English classes).

2. Put Romantic Relationships on Pause
I did get this advice because adults would tell me not to get pregnant. Instead, I think they needed to inspire me to love myself and not to get emotionally attached. I needed to hear that a man did not define me. Someone needed to tell me that I should put my love into building me.

At that time, I needed to hone my craft and become the exceptional me. I agreed with Teddy Pendergrass when he sang, "So good, good lovin' somebody and somebody loves you back." However, at that age, I needed to love myself and improve my wellbeing.

3. Embrace Your Brand
I tried to follow trends to feel a part of something or to belong. Anyone who knows me today knows that I set my trends. The bracelets I wear, as I typed this, were made by my daughter. I upcycled a broken watch into a bracelet with colored pebbles. Back then, I would have wanted to fit in. I changed my hair and damaged it to please people. I encourage young people today: be your beautiful self and set trends. Build your brand and be confident with it.

4. Do More Volunteering
The old people used to say, "had a been know never come in front." It was only recently that the BVI mandated that all graduating high school seniors complete 120 hours of community service. When I first went to UVI in 1995, my sisters were in the process of completing their community service hours as a graduating requirement. I wished that I had that experience.

The benefits of volunteering include job experience and access to references who can attest to your work ethic. You also have the fulfillment of doing something meaningful. Some parents were opposed to the community service requirement in the BVI; however, the benefits far outweigh any disadvantages. We may claim that performing the hours is time-consuming, but it is time well spent. It also opens job opportunities.

5. Stand Up and Take Action
As a child, I was an extrovert. After going to high school, I pulled into a shell. Even today, I am the quiet voice in a crowded room. I would tell my younger self to voice opinions and take more risks. Somehow we become shy and reactive. I do not know if it is the harsh criticism we often give each other. It could be adults or persons in seniority disregard the opinions of the young people, inexperienced or subordinate. Sometimes our best innovations come from a novice.

So I would tell any young person today to share your ideas and your talents. Please be respectful but do not bottle up your inspiration. We allow children to showcase their amazing imaginations in primary school. So what happens when we become adults? We let people influence us to hide our imaginations and conform to the norms. Continue to dream! Do articulate your ideas to persons who will appreciate your viewpoint and who can implement your suggestions.

6. "Not Every Skin Teeth is a Smile"
I am sure every Caribbean island has a version of this colloquialism. Per The Virgin Islands Dictionary, 'skin teet' means "to smile widely and often." The saying tells us to be mindful of persons who may seem pleasant. They may have bad intentions. You would not expect anything negative because the person will seem genuine.

I was told this but never understood until I started working. I watched one of my appointment letters circulate in an office by persons who warmly greeted me on my first day. I would not have expected that from seasoned professionals. I have learned well, and I would never do that to another person.

Reflection
I shared the top six (6) things that I wish someone had shared with me when I was younger. Do you agree? What would you add or subtract? Will you advise young people within your reach to consider similar to what I have shared?

One hymn line that has stuck with me is "it only takes a spark to get the fire going." Let's ignite a fire of passion, confidence, and critical thinking in our youth. Each adult has something that they can share to encourage some young person. Please be mindful of your approach and do not overdo it or bombard the person. Share your story so that your listeners can understand the context. Go out and inspire a young person today.

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